The Advertising Mascot Death Match Tournament: Round 2

by @TheClemReport on September 12, 2014

Brand Mascot Deathmatch

Well it has been a while since Round 1, but the we have finally made it to Round 2 of the Advertising Mascot Death Match Tournament.  So read the rules and vote on the matchups below.  I have included the CBS March Madness song for inspiration as you make your picks.

Rules:

  1. Seeding and opening matchups are drawn at random.
  2. Each matchup is a fight to the death.
  3. Competitors are allowed to bring any item that is generally associated with them.  Example: Batman would have all his gadgets, Link would have his sword, Indiana Jones would have a whip, etc.  The items the fighters have will be noted in the blog.
  4. Tie-breakers are decided by a coin flip.

Round 2

cleanvlassic

Mr. Clean vs. Mayhem  

Tale of the Tape:

Mr. Clean comes into the match after an absolute beat down of the Vlassic Pickle Stork while Mayhem had little trouble with the Brawny Man.  Again, Mr. Clean definitely gives off an “ex-convict gone good” vibe while Mayhem has to be the 21st century spokesman version of Tyler Durden.

geiohamburglar

Geico Caveman vs. Joe Camel 

Tale of the Tape:

The Geico Caveman had some trouble with the carnivorous convict known as The Hamburglar while Joe Camel simply curb stomped Sprout, The Little Big Giant”.  So the question is who do you got, the Missing Link of mascots or the humanized smoking camel?

fishvsfred

Gorton’s Fisherman vs. Burger King 

Tale of the Tape:

The Fisherman put Fred The Baker out to pasture pretty easily, while the Burger King cracked the bougie Mr. Peanut without breaking a sweat.  Now the old, salty man from the sea takes on the creepy, masked man from BK.

gparabbit

Nesquik Rabbit vs. Little Caesar  

Tale of the Tape:

The Nesquik rabbit beat the ever-living shit out of the Six Flags Grandpa while Little Caesar impaled Punchy of Hawaiian Punch fame.  The rabbit has the size and reach advantage while Little Caesar has old man strength and a motherfucking pizza spear.

 

Follow me on Twitter or suggest future tournament themes/competitors @TheClemReport

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